There was no flag-waving and patriotic speech making this year at the Abbott
Hotel's annual 4th of July party. But there was plenty of disjointed
discussion and mind boggling items of interest the most laughable of which
was the patronizing of the long forgotten Diane Jenkins and her baby, Kyle
Abbott.
For all the trouble Jack Abbott and his then wife Phyllis Summers went
through to force Diane into giving up Kyle damn but what they didn't turn
the kid over to Diane who took the boy long ago to parts unknown. Now,
suddenly, on the 4th of July of all days, Jack put on a sad face when it
became apparent Diane wasn't going to show up.
Was Diane invited? Does she
take it for granted that each year the Abbott's throw a party and she's
expected to bring Kyle? Incredibly, Ashley Carlton thought Diane was going
to be there with the kid and when Jack said it wasn't to be, quipped, "I
know how much it meant to you to have Kyle here."
Not to be upstaged, 9-year-old Noah Newman asked if he could go swimming in
the pool and was told he could so long as mommy watched over him. Noah, a
baseball all-star, didn't understand the logic so Sharon Newman explained.
Noah is "not a strong swimmer yet." Noah still didn't get it. Doesn't mommy
know that his half-sister is watching over him? Had Sharon forgotten
Cassie went into the sky so she could become a Guardian Angel and she's
watching over him and won't let anything bad happen to him?
Sharon's ears might have been burning for at that moment,
in the dark and dangerous at night park, which is so safe in the daytime the
squirrels come out to watch the nuts, Victor and Nikki Newman were
strolling along and reminiscing when Victor's radar went off. Was Nikki
thinking about Cassie again?
Nikki said it was true. In fact, she was especially thinking of Cassie at
this moment in time because the 4th of July "was her [Cassie's] favorite
holiday" much the way Valentine's Day is Colleen Carlton's favorite and
don't forget Paul Williams' favorite meal sauerkraut and spare ribs. From
there the elderly Newmans rehashed their angry son and whether Nick
will ever get over Cassie's death.
Victor confirmed Nick is "stricken with grief" and "rage". But he made
no mention of how quickly Nick forgot all about the death of his own
biological son. Victor did say too that in time of Sharon's grief they are
"being there" for the slut yet not only haven't they seen Sharon in days
they
had no knowledge or intention of being with her at the Abbott party because
Victor had made special arrangements with Athletic Club manager Gina Roma to keep the
club open this holiday just for him much the way Roma had kept the club open
during inventory for Bobby Marsino.
And so hi-ho, hi-ho, it was off to the club they go to find that Gina - I
rarely take holidays off - in all her fat ass glory, had the - we
never really close - club all prepared. The Newman's private dining room
beckoning the happy couple was seated at a table as Roma vowed she'd be
"standing by" so as to fulfill their every request. Like they do so often
the Newman's practically renewed their wedding vows, swore that if they can
survive this latest tragedy they can survive anything and to show just how
much they're willing to be there for Sharon announced their departure this
Fall on a three-week love boat cruise in the Greek Isles. How they could
possibly know Sharon will be fully recovered, that she and her husband will
be "back on track" by the Fall, was indeed another of those mysterious
events Genoa City is so famous for.
Back at the Abbott Hotel the grieving Sharon wasn't exactly dressed in
black. With little covering her anorexic body Sharon strutted around the
pool causing a bone to sprout in her escort's pants. Yes, the very married
Brad Carlton had gone out of his way to make the one-hour trip to the Newman
ponderosa and back again just so he could do a little something to lighten
Sharon's heavy load. She very much enjoyed drowning her sorrows in the
drinks Brad served up going so far as to share a toast to friendship and
pose for photographs.
Also noting Sharon's lack of gloom was Jill Abbott who thought it "very
interesting" along with Michael Baldwin and Lauren Fenmore who observed,
that as a couple, they'd never been around so many people. Jill was pleased
to see the new Jabot Cosmetics fashion photographer among the crowd and that
he'd dropped by to take a few "snapshots" which was not an oddity given
today's world of digital photography as the elite in this town are about ten
years behind the technological times On Star in their Buicks not
withstanding.
That Malfunction Winters was there - sans each and every other member of the
Winters clan including the infamous Dr. Olivia Winters with whom he lives -
was noteworthy because Winters said he too knows that Sharon and her husband
will be back on track soon at which time he plans to start work at Jabot.
Winters also checked in with private detective Paul 'Clueless' Williams and
learned the only work Williams seems to be doing on The Fugitive
case is to check daily for activity on Daniel Romalotti's credit card.
Seeing none Williams looks for golden opportunities to be with the very
married Ashley.
Overall, the utmost concern at this year's celebration of independence, the
one thing people couldn't stop talking about was how Sharon was holding up.
Several guests found it remarkable that only a few weeks since her
daughter's death Sharon seemed to be back on track. Brad explained the
phenomena of women quickly forgetting their dead offspring as one of "being
around kids".
Alas, with so many photos of the dead Cassie seemingly in everyone's
pockets, it was inevitable Sharon would see one and that's all it took to
send her into a bawling jag. Of all the shoulders she could have cried on
Sharon choose Brad's much to the married man's godless delight.
Butchering Doctor Gone but Not Forgotten
GCN Staff Report
September 5, 2005
Since Dr. Olivia
Winters couldn't be bothered to say good-bye to her one and only niece,
didn't seem to be aware that Lily Winters was in serious legal trouble and
had what is suspected to be unprotected sex with a "bad seed" and because
it's expected the doctor who gave malpractice new meaning won't be around as
often next year as she was this year, we thought this might be a
good time to look at the doctor's greatest under-achievements since 2004.
It was January that year when the GCN once again called for the revocation of
Dr. Winters' medical license
for having the audacity to suggest a four-year-old girl eat cheese. Taking
a moment out from her witch-doctoring duties at the home of socialites Brad and
Ashley Carlton, Olivia had noticed the Carlton's young daughter appeared hungry.
"Can I make you a snack? How about a cheese sandwich?" the butcher actually
said, as if the rampant, uncontrolled, pandemic weight issues upon the
nation would not affect the
already massive amount of fat babies and children roaming the planet like
piglets on a hog farm.
It was October when Olivia dropped by the Carlton home again unannounced to
check up on a now six-year-old Abby who had long since recovered from a
dislocated shoulder following a fall at the Newman Ponderosa from a
full-grown horse. Ashley reported that a month after the fact Abby was still
having "some pain" and had been left with "emotional scars" that no Jabot
skin cream would ever cover. Adding her intent to get psychological help
from Abby's biological father, Olivia objected until Ashley promised to
obtain permission from Abby's adopted daddy to allow Victor Newman's
practice of medicine without a license.
Brad Carlton might
have agreed had he not walked out on Ashley again and learning this Olivia became downright judgmental.
She asked if Ashley planned to "ride off into the sunset with Abby on
Victor's knee."
The question at the time was where Olivia got off playing Mother Teresa when
so many had suffered as a result of her coat-hanger surgery. How
many had died or been mutilated by her botched medical procedures and
experimental treatment and the pills written on her prescription pads by
unlicensed doctors? Not that it mattered, Abby made a fine recovery on her
own and Victor quickly forgot he'd sworn an oath to get to know Abby better.
In November Olivia was pulling ER duty when shooting victim Damon Porter was
rolled into the facility along with samurai sword sliced and diced victim
Dominic Hughes. As Olivia barked orders Porter and Hughes were placed
behind curtains #2 and #3 with Porter receiving preferential
treatment as Olivia made it a point to show her partisanship toward the
patient she recognized as someone she'd seen once with her evil sister.
As for Porter's I-wish-I-had-a-son like Daniel Romalotti, the kid's
suggestion that Olivia just go to a kidney store for a new kidney Porter was
thought to have needed was flicked
off by Olivia's declaration, "the liver is an amazing organ" without so much
as a mention that Daniel has said kidney when he must have meant liver or
that spare bodies parts just can't be slapped into patients
needing transplants. As for any hope Porter would live, Olivia said [without
knowing the patient's prognosis] "I don't want to mislead anyone. There is
always hope, but in this case hope is minimal." Then, as if enough time
hadn't already been wasted, Porter's lover ordered Olivia to "get in there
and do what you can".
Adding insult to the overall intelligence Olivia
returned moments later to say Porter's condition was stable, and during what
was supposed to have been a medical emergency, took time out to take a
personal phone call from a man she thought was dead.
And then, as friends were holding a séance over Porter, his life monitor
went flat giving rise to the need for Olivia to call a Code Blue which
wouldn't have been necessary had she done her job in the first place. But of
course, had she done this Porter would not have been able to rise off his
death bed, stand next to Phyllis Summers, hold her hand and that of his
dead son, Elias.
During 2005 the butchering doctor, like her son Nate who was rushed to a
boarding school in London just because he wouldn't grow, has rarely been
seen except for when she fleeted about like a flying monkey during the
Cassie Newman trauma. Sucking on a Valium vial most of the time, Olivia kept
saying she would get Cassie "stabilized", but the kid expired at a time when
Victor had said "only the best doctors" would be allowed to work on
his granddaughter.
So maybe it's a good thing Dr. Winters won't be seen much
anymore. With Brad sniffing around for someone he can put the pork
to, Olivia is easy prey. Unlike those before her when Olivia should decide
to get out of Genoa City she'll always be remembered as the woman who gave Brad
(what her sister called) "The best F---" he ever had.
Mother's
Day Special
by Kelley Jarvis
Let's look at three Genoa City moms. First and
foremost is Mary Williams. A GC News colleague, Michael Kelly, aptly
described her face this way: "She looks like a baboon sipping vinegar."
While Mrs. Williams has been guilty of being an overbearing mother, her
actions were possibly motivated by the sometimes bad behavior of her brood.
Paul Williams wasn't exactly a saint in his younger days. Mary suffered a
miscarriage when she attempted to break up a fight between the future
private eye and his brother, Steve. Paul blamed himself for the miscarriage
and donated blood to save his mother's life.
Young Paul was quite rebellious and promiscuous. He met the future Mrs.
Victor Newman when she was selling flowers on a street corner, trying to
raise cash for a commune. She convinced Paul to join the group and Paul paid
her back with the gift that keeps on giving, VD.
In 1983, another Williams offspring was in trouble. Patty Williams fell in
love with Jack Abbott and married him. She became pregnant with his baby,
but miscarried after seeing Jack and Diane Jenkins 'doing the nasty.' Then,
Patty learned that Jack only married her to gain control of Jabot Cosmetics.
She snapped, went to Jack's office and ventilated her hubby with three
bullets.
Over the years, Mary has evolved or devolved (depending on one's opinion)
into a cartoon-like stereotype of an extremely loving and
devoted-but-overbearing mom. The high points in her life were preparing
sauerkraut and spare ribs for Paul, attending church and nagging her son and
his wife du jour to produce a grandchild. She has two grandchildren by Paul,
a daughter with April Stevens and a son with dizzy Izzy Williams. Somehow,
little Ricky Williams disappeared from the face of the earth and was never
seen or heard from again.
Mary is very perceptive. She disliked the Albino Insect from the get-go. St.
Christine 'Bug' Blair had a great deal of fun provoking her future
mother-in-law into semi-apoplectic fits by showing her the wedding dress of
her dreams-a red-nightmare from fashion hell. Paul's mom almost had the last
laugh when she was briefly suspected of squashing this "Bug". The poor woman
was literally driven to drink-large quantities of cooking sherry. Of course,
Christine's faux demise was staged by deranged Isabella in the infamous tale
of the bloody fishing boat.
The topic of heavy drinking leads us to the never dull mother/daughter duo
of Katherine Chancellor and Jill Foster Abbott. The bad blood between these
dames goes back to 1974. After researching their respective histories, it's
easy to see why these women hated each other.
Young Jill Foster came from an impoverished family. She, her two brothers
Greg and Snapper Foster were left without a father when he abandoned his
wife, Liz, and his family. Liz foster toiled in a factory to make ends meet
and put Greg through law school.
Jill worked as a beautician, but secretly dreamed of being a model. She was
befriended by the woman who turned out to be her biological mother,
Katherine Chancellor. Kay had everything Jill longed for. Money, a mansion,
power and her husband, Phillip.
"Mrs. C." hired this young woman to be her companion, allowing Jill to 'move
on up' to the good life at the Chancellor Estate. Sometimes, it was the
not-so-good-life for Jill, Kay and Phillip. Kay had an alcohol abuse problem
and Jill tried to help her employer beat the bottle. Unbeknownst to
Katherine, Jill and Phillip were becoming more than friends. In fact,
Phillip wanted to divorce Kay and marry Jill. In the meantime, Katherine was
playing matchmaker, trying to bring her son from a former marriage, Brock
Reynolds and Jill together. During this time, Kay became suspicious of the
goings on between her husband and her 'companion.' She went as far as
bugging the house to eavesdrop on their conversations and following the
couple to a small cabin in the woods where they would tryst.
At first, Jill was against marrying Phillip, but found she was pregnant. Kay
bribed Brock to seduce and marry Jill. The plan worked and the new Mr. and
Mrs. Reynolds lived in a cabin in the woods. I've always wondered if they
lived in Phillip and Jill's love nest. Maybe the woods of Genoa City has an
unknown amount of log-constructed hideaways since Jill had an affair in a
cabin with Jack Abbott while she was married to his father, John.
I'm getting ahead of myself, so I'll stick to the above mentioned story.
Kay's drinking became worse. She met Phillip at the airport, drunk as a
skunk, and had a wreck that put Phillip in the hospital. During his stay, he
married Jill before he died from his injuries. Jill held Katherine
responsible for his death. Since Jill was the 'new' Mrs. Chancellor, she
booted her former employer out of her home and brought in her family. Kay
sought revenge and managed to re-gain her mansion, claiming she was coerced
into signing divorce papers while she under the influence of alcohol. Mrs.
C. stopped drinking for a short period of time, but Jill did everything in
her power to make her fall off of the wagon.
The women shared a strange bond between then Phillip Chancellor Jr. In later
years, Jill shipped the boy off to boarding school. The classic case of 'out
of sight, out of mind' the young man formed a friendship with Katherine and
she treated him as if he were her biological son instead of her grandson.
Phillip Jr. developed an alcohol abuse problem and was killed in a wreck,
just like his father. Both father and son were buried on the grounds of the
Chancellor Estate. These graves also served as tangible reminders of Jill's
and Kay's hate for one another.
In some ways, Jill was a 'mother' in another connotation of the term. During
her first marriage to John Abbott, she became pregnant and became determined
to cease her pregnancy. While hanging curtains, you guessed it, oops! Jill
had an 'accident' when she fell off of a ladder. Her picture is probably
next to the definition of the word 'bitch' in the dictionary.
Years later, she re-married "Yawn" Abbott and produced their son, Billy. She
was the doting mother for a few years until she became pre-occupied with
getting more money, Jabot Cosmetics and any man within her reach.
Billy grew up to be a spoiled twit who nearly married his cousin, Mackenzie
Browning.
Nearly two years ago, a bombshell revelation rocked the worlds of Katherine
and Jill. It seems that Kay had an affair, many years ago and had an
illegitimate daughter, Jill. She put the baby up for adoption. Jill wound up
being 'adopted' by Liz Foster and her husband, completely unaware that she
wasn't their biological child.
Most GCN readers know the rest of the tale which culminated in one of Jean
Cooper's finest moments. Her alter ego, Katherine, had a stroke as she
realized the horrifying truth that her worst enemy was in fact her child.
During Kay's recovery, she and Jill worked hard at putting their differences
aside and eventually tolerated and possibly loved one another.
Wow! As the fictional Kelly Bundy once stated, "My brain is full" from all
this research. Maybe I'll unwind by watching a film that would fit in
perfectly with some of the subject matter, "Mommy Dearest."
What with Paul 'Clueless' Williams' new love for Kevin Fisher it
might help to ask, "Oh my God, what have they done, and how did it
all go so wrong, and how much Prozac and praying to a very
disappointed God will it take to fix it?
Let's go to the videotape. There, February 20, 2004. More things
that make residents of Genoa City ask why the hell they live in the
country's most backward closed-minded convoluted messed-up bubble
the world has ever known.
His woman out with the city's most "dangerous man" for going on
something like five hours, private dick Clueless and his side-kick
J.T. Hellstrom held off rushing to crazy Kevin Fisher's apartment
where it was suspected Lauren Fenmore might be in serious trouble.
Pacing back and forth at the Clueless bat cave Williams and
Hellstrom anxiously awaited the arrival of semi-real detective Hank
Weber. Although it was nearly 1AM, an alert-looking Weber had no
problem being summoned at the ungodly hour and happily listened as
Williams babbled that he had information sure to nail Fisher as the
culprit who fried local stripper Brittany Hodges. His memory not
what it once was, Weber asked if the stripper in question was the
same as that who had recently been shocked within an inch of her
life at the infamous Gentlemen's Club. Before Williams could answer
Hellstrom quipped, "he damn near electrocuted her," as if there was
a difference between being shocked and electrocuted.
Aware that what little he'd learned about Fisher was
"circumstantial" evidence at best, Williams pulled out the smoking
gun. Fisher, like hundreds of other people with common electrical
knowledge, had once been an electricians' apprentice. This, plus
some duct tape and a tool box found illegally at Fisher's apartment,
linked him to the Hodges case.
"He was playing with wires and switches," Williams proudly belched,
followed immediately by one of the most ignorant statements
Hellstrom had ever made during his short, meaningless life.
"Strange for a bookkeeper," Hellstrom burped.
Trying very hard not to burst out laughing, Weber did not tell
Hellstrom there was nothing the least bit strange about a bookkeeper
having electrical equipment given that Fisher was once an
electricians assistant and that Williams and Hellstrom's entire
premise was predicated on this fact.
To bolster his case, Williams snorted that Fisher had an axe to
grind after being fired from his job thanks to a pack of
pitchfork-wielding teenage girls. Because of this, Fisher tried to
kill Hodges.
Asked where Fisher might be at this late hour, Williams muttered
that he was seen over an hour ago leaving the Athletic Supporter
with Little Shop of Horrors owner, Lauren Fenmore. Incredibly,
Williams noted that Fenmore should have been at the bat cave long
ago but hadn't arrived and he had been standing around all this time
trying to find his ass.
"Do you think she's in danger," Weber asked.
"I don't know," Williams actually said, pointing out to Weber that
Fenmore had been trying to entrap Fisher into saying something that
could be used against him.
Weber must have known at this point he was dealing with the sorriest
pack of boobs and wannabe cops on the planet for he said, "I hate it
when you people get cute."
A snarling Williams fired back that he, the most clueless PI in the
universe, had made more progress in one night that the entire police
department had in weeks.
"I've uncovered evidence no one else has," Williams lied, as what
little Williams has learned was common knowledge he picked up
secondhand.
When a skeptical Weber asked if anyone had seen the physical
evidence Williams claimed to know about, Hellstrom said that Lily
Winters had seen it when she entered Fisher's apartment illegally.
The hair on Weber's back stood on end when he heard this. And just
what was Winters doing in Fisher's apartment, he wondered.
"Does it matter?" Hellstrom replied, and Weber, obviously bored to
tears must have thought, gosh, no. It doesn't matter that Fisher's
apartment was searched illegally and that what he was hearing from
Hellstrom was hearsay.
Nevertheless, the law mangling went on when Williams insisted Weber
get a search warrant right then and there. Surely, there was a slew
of sleepy judges just waiting for his call. Before making the call
Weber asked if Williams was really sure it was important enough to
wake up a judge.
Worried that someone might be getting hurt as they spoke, like, duh,
Lauren Fenmore, Williams said it was. And as sure as Izzy Williams
was rotting in a jail somewhere having never been afforded a lawyer
or a trial, Weber got his warrant and within minutes was at Fisher's
apartment.
The twin PIs didn't tag along, Instead, they waited for Fenmore to
arrive at the bat cave.
"I was so worried," Williams told her, and incredibly Fenmore didn't
say, "You weren't so worried you bothered to get off your ass and
come check on me. Don't you know I've been with that dangerous man
all night? Kevin pulled a gun on me! It was really scary. What in
hell have you and monkey boy here being doing?"
Armed with a warrant, Weber handed it to Michael Baldwin who had
easily convinced his half-brother to give up the gun and let Fenmore
go. Between hugs and kisses Baldwin scanned the warrant. Like most
issued in Genoa City, it was based on vague evidence. Still, because
brother Kevin had thrown in the towel, Baldwin allowed Weber to
conduct the search.
Prior to that incident, and keep in mind this happened just two
years ago and now Clueless is in bed with Fisher, it was February
17, 2004, when management at the Genoa City Athletic Supporter Club
couldn't say when the announcement had been made over the club's PA
system. The main event, the spectacular Valentine's Day Dance, had
been cancelled.
Guests who'd come solely for the purpose of watching Clueless
demonstrate the fine art of dangerous person capturing didn't seem
to notice that Clueless had failed to show up as promised. Major
players in the plot to entrap Fisher, Colleen Carlton and Hellstrom
went ice skating while their crime-fighting pals, who had bragged
how sweet it would be watching Clueless take Fisher down, the
Oreo-eating Sierra Hoffman and Lily Winters slipped away without
notice as did Winters' parents.
Despite the late hour, Dru Winters checked in at the office for a
missing orchid update presumably unaware that her husband, a
recovering alcoholic, had last been seen at the dance ordering a
martini. That Fisher's capture would not come this night unfazed
Brad and Ashley Carlton too. The happily reunited with reality Mrs.
Carlton was engrossed in a conversation with the Newmans as to how
they might "move on" with their miserable lives and let bygones be
bygones. As for Fisher, those expecting his demise did not express
concern when he left the party with the lovely Lauren Fenmore on his
arm.
A few days earlier, Clueless had badgered Baldwin as to why he would
allow Fisher into his office much less give Fisher legal advise,
there was a growing concern over why Clueless had repeatedly said
that Baldwin wanted Fisher off the streets as much as everyone else.
Apparently aware he was wasting his time running to Baldwin's office
every five minutes, Clueless became agitated when Baldwin kept
bringing up the fact that this is still America and people have a
right to be represented in legal matters. Getting nowhere, Clueless
threatened to approach Fisher. Perceiving this as a threat, Baldwin
got squirmy and before a group of angry demons with pitchforks
wanting him dead rushed in to stick him, Baldwin confessed Fisher is
his brother.
Meantime, Hellstrom was telling his other girlfriend, Raul
Guittierez, that life as a PI in-training had him out on the streets
at all hours following Fisher and that he'd witnessed the suspected
firebug coming out of a lawyer's office. Like his mentor, Hellstrom
didn't know what it meant, but it was a good thing because once he
and Charlie's Angels were done, Fisher would need a good attorney.
In a related and bizarre development, Dru reported to her husband
that she knew all about the plan to take Fisher down and not to be
shocked and awed when the event unfolded before their very black and
sunken eyes at the Valentine's Day dance. At about the same time,
Colleen alerted her dance-going father that Fisher would be at the
dance with Fenmore and that it was all an elaborate plan Clueless
and Hellstrom had cooked up to "get something on" Fisher that would
"put him away for good."
A creeped out Brad Carlton was incensed. How dare Fisher attend the
same dance as his darling daughter? Couldn't they have Fisher
charged with breaking some law? Totally out of the loop for weeks
and knowing next to nothing about Fisher, the formerly lost in a fog
sperm-thieving Ashley Carlton hacked, "We should be able to avoid
Fisher long enough for Paul to make a case. We all want him put away
for good."
The mind-numbing didn't stop there.
A few moments later Sierra was seen asking the pubescent Colleen if
she thought Fenmore could really pull it off. If she could this
would be a night they'd long remember. Carlton smirked that Fisher
need only make one little "slip" and it would be curtains. Then Lily
surfaced to tell Hellstrom she'd found the smoking gun! Yes, when
she broke into Fisher's apartment earlier using a key he had given
her and conveniently forgotten about and never changed the locks
when she ratted him out to the cops as the one who gave her an STD,
Lily had found the most incriminating evidence sure to get Fisher
the electric chair.
A tool box containing a roll of duct tape!
To prove again just what an idiot he is, Hellstrom snorted, duh, "I
didn't know Kevin was such a handy man." Then, as if he hadn't
already made a fool of himself, Hellstrom said he hoped Fisher would
have a few drinks too many and tell Fenmore all about the crimes
he'd committed.
And then, for all the troubled they'd gone through, Kevin got away
with his crimes. He found God and eventually turned his enemies into
believers that he'd become a changed man.
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