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by Todd Brown
July 26, 2008

I don't expect we'll ever see that new house Nikki bought, but at least there is a new set representing a "house" that Cane bought. I guess it doesn't take much to impress Lily (no surprise there) because that's the ugliest looking house I've ever seen. The rock walls look like something out of The Brady Bunch and in fact are recycled from the sleazy motel set where Sheila Carter, Tom Fisher and other villains stay whenever they're in town. The kitchen counters are a hideous shade of green Formica, and the floors Lily thinks are hardwood look exactly like the peel and stick vinyl floor squares I had in my front hall at my last house. And please don't tell me they went out and bought that fluorescent orange sectional sofa together. Neither one of them had any furniture to begin with; maybe they went dumpster diving.

Sabrina is the latest in a long line of women with a gestation period peculiar to Genoa City. As she and Victor sat and looked at their sonogram she mused that "in a few months" they'd be holding the baby in their arms. Judging by the looks of her she can't be more than six weeks pregnant. So, I guess she realized she's destined to give premature birth like most women in this town, even if she's pregnant for eleven or twelve months like Victoria and Sharon were, who still gave birth to premature babies.

But then she said she was due in December. December? That makes her four months pregnant. And she's not even showing. Either this show takes place on another planet that spins around the sun a lot faster than Earth or else nobody in this town can count. Or it's just another case of soap opera women not showing at all until they're about six or seven months pregnant then one day they wake up and have to wear maternity clothes.

Meanwhile Victor gets on the phone and starts calling everyone he knows, telling them to pull their advertising from Restless Style. And they do. Because successful companies are successful not by advertising in magazines that are flying off the shelves at such a rate that overnight reprints are required, but by listening to Victor Newman, just because he's mad at his kids. It's like he's Damien: Omen II or something and nobody can resist his will lest they end up with crows pecking their eyes out.

Sabrina seems to be getting a bit wise to him, although it's probably a little too little, and a little too late. Watching him cut his kids out of his will and out of his life simply because, in his words, they "disrespected him" alerted her to the fact that she and her baby may well suffer the same fate one day. No wonder she was scrambling to repair the damage. It should have been even more of an eye opener when Victor said he was glad to get a "second chance" at fatherhood. Second? Try fourth, Victor. Granted he didn't willingly have Abby but the spawn of Sabrina is not his second kid.

I got a big kick out of Victor and Nikki vying for the title of "worse parent." Granted, neither one of them will ever wind up on a Hallmark card, but I think Victor owns that title. True, Nikki was a drunk and a stripper, so no points there. On the other hand, she doesn't make semi annual sojourns into the wilderness leaving everyone to wonder whether she's dead or alive and not giving a damn like Victor does. And no matter who she's been married to she always had her kids living with her. Victor on the other hand has always been emotionally distant and demanding, and expects them to bend over and take it when he treats them or their mother like crap simply because he's rich and gave them stuff. Like they asked to be his children and should be kissing his ass for having them.

Likewise, when Katherine and Victor were comparing notes on parenting, Victor had the nerve so say that Katherine was the pot calling the kettle black. Uh, hello? Brock turned out OK and Jill wasn't even raised by Katherine, she was raised by Liz Foster. But because Katherine is 80 Victor allows her to criticize him even though he brushes her off like some senile old lady who doesn't know what she's talking about and has to humor her.

And no matter what Victor does to his kids, whether he cuts them out of his will, throws them off his property, or tells them what horrible little losers they are, he still expects them to show up for a command performance at his house on his say-so. And - they do! Because, when Victor summons people, they come like zombies in the night. Whether it's friend or foe, or a complete stranger from France with a wool scarf wrapped around his neck in the middle of summer just to emphasize that he's French in case the phony accent throws you, they come. They always have, and they always will, until the day that Victor dies. Or the day this show is canceled, whichever comes first.

My money is on the latter.

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