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by
Todd Brown
April 4, 2009
I don't know where they thought they were going with
this Kevin and Amber caper, but I've seen more
plausible schemes on I Love Lucy. When they were
robbing that bank I think even Ethel and Lucy would
have looked at that and said "Yeah, that's dumb."
I don't understand what Amber was trying to do. She
had plenty of opportunities to simply walk away and
call for help. I mean, if she wanted to help Kevin,
wouldn't that have been the easiest course of
action? She sure as hell wasn't doing him any
favors, or herself for that matter, by aiding and
abetting him in his crime spree. When Kevin passed
out in the bank why didn't she simply tell the
employees to call the police? She seemed to be under
the delusion that if she could just talk sense into
crazy Kevin everything would turn into sunshine and
roses.
Amazingly enough, the keystone cops in Backwater,
Minnesota were just as inept as their brethren in
Genoa City. The head detective not only let the
perp's brother and best bud follow him around in the
investigation but actually let Daniel access the
bank security video and left him alone with it. Why
didn't Daniel just erase the damn thing? Hey, if
things don't work out in the art world, it looks
like Daniel has a promising future in the world of
law enforcement.
Since when in the hell does someone list their ex
husband as a job reference? I'm at a loss to explain
what kind of spokesperson job Sharon might have even
applied for if it's not for Jabot or Newman
Cosmetics. Yet Nick got a phone call from somebody
asking for his reference and he couldn't bend over
backwards far enough to praise Sharon to the sky.
Even though she not only bailed on her marriage to
him but bailed on him as a spokeswoman for Newman
not once, but twice. But hey, considering the work
ethic in Genoa City, that's probably a sterling
example of an employee AND a wife.
The Today Show can do a new special segment
now called Where in the World is Sharon Abbott.
One day she lives with Jack, the next day she lives
at the athletic club, the next day she's back at the
Abbott mansion, and the next day she's back at the
club. I bet the concierge at the club just rolls his
eyes every time she walks in with her luggage on
wheels. I know I sure do.
Where the hell is Noah living? It seems like Sharon
just ran into him at the coffee shop when he invited
himself along for the rehearsal dinner. Where the
hell else was he going to go? He can't keep track of
where his mother lives on any given day, and he sure
as hell can't go to his dad's house because there's
a 50/50 chance he'll walk in on Nick and Phyllis
having sex on the living room sofa at any given
moment.
As much as I'd like to root for Noah he sure makes
it hard to do hanging around with Eden. Yes, it's
true that Sharon is no prize winning mother but I
don't ever recall her draping a blanket over the
baby crib to get the child to sleep. Eden seemed to
think Cordelia was like a parakeet and would shut up
if she covered the bassinet with a blanket. Which,
in point of fact, she did. Perhaps permanently. That
ought to solve a lot of unnecessary problems.
Since it looks like Murphy will soon be abandoning
his trailer for the lap of luxury at the Chancellor
estate, maybe Sharon can move in there. I can't
think of a more appropriate place for trash like
her. Maybe she can take over Marge's job as waitress
at the diner if she's looking for work. Although
waitressing may be a bit beyond her abilities of
standing around looking like an idiot. Maybe Murphy
can hire her to dig up worms for his bait and tackle
shop.
Where the hell has Doris gotten to? She knows her
daughter is an out of control kleptomaniac and she
just wheeled away and left her to her own devices.
But then again, who can blame her? Now I see where
Sharon gets her parenting skills.
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